Statement of Solidarity and Crazy Hair Day

You have probably heard of many since 2000 who have shaved off their hair in a statement of solidarity with those suffering from cancer. In fact, St. Baldrick's has held events in 48 states and 18 countries in which 71,000 volunteers have shaved their heads and raised almost $50 million in support of cancer research, either on their own or in a team of volunteers.

Well, this young man above decided to shave his head as he did over three years ago for his grandfather, but this time, he combined it with crazy hair day at school. His name is Randall Foster Miller, my grandson whose middle name is the same as mine. Isn’t that a great hair style? I never did that when I was a kid but in high school, I did bleach my hair. I took a toothbrush and put it on my hair but nothing changed. So I did it over and over again and finally it did change! For a while, I thought I would be kicked out of school for doing this, but somehow I survived. But Randall was more creative than I was. He did what he wanted and tied it into a school function! Randall is the son of Mike and Katie.

Somebody Read my Blog

This morning the doorbell rang and I went to see who it was. It was the postman. He had left a package. It was neatly wrapped and said “Don’t Bend.” It was from one of my former professors and good friend Dr. William G. Bellshaw. I quickly opened it, wondering what it was, and it was The Seattle Times from Sunday, February 22. On the front cover was a picture of Griffey with the words, “Remember this smile?” Then inside was the sports page where there was a full page, collectible Griffey poster like in the picture above. What a thoughtful gift in light of my previous story. So, eat your heart out sons!

This is so neat because I don’t know if Dr. Bellshaw knew this, but my dad collected newspapers and I have done the same since I was a kid. I have a newspaper about the ending of World War II from the Cleveland Press, August 15, 1945. But one of most interesting saves I kept was from October 8, 1956. The headlines read, Yanks’ Larsen Joins Baseball’s ‘Immortals” 1st ‘No-No’ Is Also Perfect Game. Then The Wenatchee Daily World went on to say in bold print:

NEW YORK ,(AP)—Don Larsen of the Yankees pitched the first perfect game in World Series history and Mickey Mantle hit a telling home run Monday as the Yankees whipped the Dodgers 2-0 in the fifth World Series game and took a 3-2 lead in the series. Larsen didn't give a hit or a walk. And not a Dodger reached first.

Never before in World Series history has there been a no-hit game, much less one in which a team failed to get a man on base. Larsen, a 6-foot, 4-inch native of Michigan City, Ind., who now lives in San Diego, Calif., pitched superbly with the peculiar no-windup :style he adopted during the regular season. He struck out seven, including the last man to face him, pinch hitter Dale Mitchell.

What I find interesting today besides the perfect game and its write up was that I saved the paper when I was fifteen years of age. I told my son Scott (one of my two baseball freaks) about it and then one day in the early 1990s, I was out of town when Don Larsen came to Salem. Scott quickly went through my old newspapers, found the front page of this story and took it down for Larsen to autograph it. The paper in those days cost seven cents and Larsen took one look at the paper and said, “Where did you get this?” He signed it and we had it framed and then gave it to Scott for a Christmas present. For years now, the front page of The Wenatchee Daily World has hung in his hallway next to his living room. So, maybe I will get this poster autographed some day too! Thanks Dr. Bellshaw for the poster.

Cancer Can Bring out just the Wrong Words

Carrie Morse, left, and restaurant owner Reem Azoury share a few laughs at Figs Fine Foods in Washington, D.C. Morse is a cancer survivor who ate regularly at Figs while in treatment at a local hospital.

Another article in USA TODAY in February that I enjoyed reading was, Cancer can bring out just the wrong words. Many don’t know what to when a friend is diagnosed. Below is the article that has a great story and some good thoughts. It is:

Like many people with cancer, Bethany Winsor found that some of her friends struggled with what to say after she was diagnosed. When one person looked at her with pity, the usually upbeat Winsor burst into tears. Yet she says a stranger on a plane somehow found the perfect words of comfort.

Winsor, 28, met the woman last year, when they were seated next to each other on their outgoing and return flights between Dallas and Washington. Winsor, who had just been diagnosed with breast cancer, felt at ease with the young woman, who was about her age, and mentioned that she was about to start chemotherapy.

Later in the flight, when Winsor was leaving the restroom, she found that the stranger was waiting for her at the back of the plane. "She said she felt there was a reason we had been seated next to each other," Winsor says. "Although she didn't know the details of what I was going through, she asked me if she could pray with me. I am not particularly religious, but I am spiritual, and at that point, I was in need of a little faith."

As the stranger held her hands, Winsor "felt a connectedness that I really needed. Even though I didn't know this girl, I will never forget her willingness to reach out to me." Though few among us can summon that sort of eloquence, the stranger's words provide a good example of how to support someone with cancer, says Julia Rowland, head of the National Cancer Institute's survivorship office.

Although the stranger showed compassion, she didn't force herself onto Winsor, Rowland says. And though religion can be a tricky subject, Rowland says the stranger on the plane struck just the right balance. The woman offered open-ended prayers but didn't presume to speak for God.

Words that don't help

The stranger didn't presume to know what was best, offer unsolicited advice or launch into religious sermons, he says. Many people with cancer say they get tired of being told what to do, even if that advice seems as bland as "You need to stay positive. "What many cancer survivors say is most meaningful is to be heard — truly listened to — and understood, not being told what to do or how to cope," Rowland says. "Many of us are inclined to leap in with advice, opinions or chatter if only to relieve our own anxiety in the face of another's suffering."

Carrie Morse, a survivor of rectal cancer, says she can't count the number of people
who told her, "God gave you cancer for a reason." Such clichés can make people feel worse, she says.

"Every person who has cancer goes through these moments where, whatever kind of God you believe in, you're pretty (ticked) off," says Morse, 36, from Washington, D.C. "You don't want to hear people saying, 'God has a plan for you.'"

Importantly, the stranger on Winsor's plane asked her permission before proceeding, allowing her to stay in control of the conversation. One of the most terrifying parts of cancer is that it often robs people of control — over their bodies, their schedules, their plans for the future, says Ellen Stovall, who leads the National Coalition for Cancer Survivorship.

Handle with care

Too often, well-meaning friends and neighbors issue orders, telling people with cancer to take this herb or see that doctor, Stovall says,

Even Winsor, who was diagnosed last year, says she tries to "walk slowly" when talking to other people with cancer and take her cues from their attitude and words, which may change from day to day.

If a person with cancer doesn't want to share, it's important to back off, Rowland says: "Be respectful." The stranger on the plane also focused on the present instead of guessing about Winsor's prognosis or offering unfounded optimism. Winsor, who had an early tumor, completed chemo in October, radiation in January and is now taking a drug called Herceptin to keep cancer from returning.

"If you say, 'Everything is going to be OK,' that's trivializing it," says psychiatrist Jimmie Holland, author of The Human Side of Cancer. "But it's also not good to say, 'Oh, my mother had that and she died in three weeks.' " Stovall says people can still share their experiences if they tread lightly.

"You can say, 'I'm sure a lot of people are offering what was helpful to them,' " Stovall says. " 'Do you even want to hear about any of those things?' "Instead of advice, one of the best things to offer is just to listen, Stovall says.

"I can remember somebody saying: 'I'm a really good listener. I offer that because it's something I can do,' " Stovall says. "Even though I may never avail myself of their offer, it can be nice to know that someone cared enough to offer."

Then in a box entitled Actions that Speak Louder than Words, here are a few excerpts from it.

• Show empathy. The National Cancer Institute's Julia Rowland suggests, "I'm sorry to hear that you're dealing with cancer," or, if appropriate, "I'm sorry the cancer has returned."

• Don't forget them. People with cancer often are cut off from friends while in the hospital or recuperating at home. A call, card or even an instant message help them feel remembered, especially on special days like birthdays….

• Offer specific help. "Let me know if I can help" is so vague that the person with cancer is unlikely to ever take up your offer, Rowland says. Instead, ask if you can do something specific: drive your friend to appointments, babysit the kids, mow the lawn, shovel the walk, clean the house, call doctors or make appointments, update a website with your friend's health news, cook a meal on a particular day or organize friends to bring a different meal each day of the week.

• Talk about something other than cancer. Many people get tired of talking about chemotherapy or blood counts. Talk about the same subjects that always interested you, from sports to current events, says Jimmie Holland, author of The Human Side of Cancer.

• Make them feel they're still one of the gang. Boyle's co-workers knew his sense of humor well enough to use humor when welcoming him back to work after chemotherapy last summer. Knowing that he would be wearing a bandanna to cover his bald head, everyone else in his office also showed up wearing one. "It was nice to know I wasn't being treated any different than before," Boyle says.

• Celebrate survival. "Everybody's first instinct was, 'Oh my gosh, I'm sorry,'" says Dan Waeger, 26, of Washington. "But when I told a stranger in a cab that I was a three-year lung cancer survivor, the reaction was, 'That's awesome. Congratulations.' That's the best reaction I've gotten."

In conclusion, let me say, “I have often thought, ‘How do people cope with this without God?’ And I am also thinking, ‘How do people cope with this without a church and without Christian friends all over the place that we know?’ I thank God for my church and my Christian friends especially because just like the story above, there are always people offering to pray for me and with me. Even on the phone, I have had people pray for me like my pastor—whose that? My son Scott! And Dr. David Nicholas, the president of Shasta Bible College and Graduate School and Dr. David Jeremiah, pastor and author in Southern California. And as you have seen in my blog, people email me their prayers, many of which I have yet to post.

And a couple more things. Just as I was wrapping this up, my wife brought in the mail. In an envelope with hearts was a poster that said, "Dear Rev. Miller. We life up our hands in prayer for you. In Christ, The Children of David Fellowship, Grace Chinese Alliance Church. This is a church that I have spoken at about once a month for the past three years or so. And on the poster are outlines of hands with their names written on the hand that each of them drew! Isn't this great? Also, later in the day, our Tonga church pastor and two of their leaders, Bill and Ana came over to pray with me.

And just this morning I received an email from Mary Smith, a person I have known since the second grade entitled, "NOT your Theology 101" and she wrote this: "I dreamed about our "new/old" WBBC group last night. It was so real! We were all together (don't worry; you were there, too!)

Now, I guess I'm stretching things a bit, and I didn't major in Theology, so bear with me...

I just finished reading/studying the book of Hebrews and that great 11th chapter took on new meaning (remember, it's a dream we're talking about)...

We, your Corban friends, are WITNESSES to your faith as you endure a journey you never planned to take. We are LIVING WITNESSES to the impact you've had--and are having--on many, many lives, including ours (mine, for sure).

We're cheering for you; we're praying for your speedy recovery, and I, for one, can't wait to see what God is going to do next in your life.

You are surrounded by love, prayers, friends, family......and modern day WITNESSES. Love, Mary. And just one more comment by Jo Sherman, a former student of mine and a trustee at Corban. She writes,

Hi David and Koyce, I love your blog, it keeps me posted as to what is going on! Thanks so much. It is so great that in life it is really the little things that bring such joy! Your sons and their love of baseball (yours too) is such a case. How wonderful to have that total love for a game and you all share it….I think of you often and pray for you and Koyce. After reading the blogs, I think your friends say it all---you two definitely are such an encouragement to me, Jack and I love you both so much and pray God will continue to give the doctors wisdom and grant you that peace in your hearts that only He can give.Love to you both, Jo (Sherman)

Yes, cancer can bring out just the wrong words but offering to pray is just what the doctor ordered, that is, The Great Physician! See James 5:16b.

Encouragement for the Ordeal

The morning after I posted the story about my two sons, I received an email from one of the dear saints in our church entitled, Encouragement for the Ordeal. She wrote saying, “Greetings Pastor Dave, I got a surprise when I read your blog last night. It was a great example of something I was planning to write to you. On Tuesday morning when I opened the newspaper I did something I rarely do, and that was to read the sports page. Now you may have done the same thing but I wasn't sure just how things were for you that day. There was a very large picture and story and it took my eye. And as I read I was so intrigued that I had to read that page and much more on a following page. It was the story of Stephen and Paul Silas, father and son who are top guys with the Warriors. You may have read it too, but just in case you missed it I saved the article. This father and son have such a beautiful relationship. While I was reading it my thoughts went to you and your sons and I thought you would love reading it. I also thought of our relationship to our Heavenly Father and how He identifies so intimately with His children and cares about everything they do, their successes and even their failures. Wednesday night at out meeting we divided into small groups and did some sharing. As Glen Stubbs was sharing about his boy and sports I had a chance to share this article which he said he had enjoyed.

Now don't think I'm not thinking and praying for you and Koyce. You are on my mind much of the time and I just breathe a prayer for whatever you are experiencing, which I'm sure is difficult. But you are on His Mind and Heart constantly and since I know you are depending on the Lord, I know you will come through with flying colors. Praying for some special blessing for you today-in Christian love, Fern.”

The article that Fern Agaard made reference to was entitled, The Son Shall Rise, Warriors Assistant doing Legendary Dad Proud by Marcus Thompson (posted in the Contra Costa Times, February 16, 2009. There was a picture too that is above and under it is said, “Stephen Silas, left, a Golden State Warriors assistant coach, stands next to his father and former NBA star Paul Silas during a visit at McClymonds High School gym in Oakland, Calif., Friday, Feb. 13, 2009. Paul played his high school basketball at McClymonds High) The article has so much that I love in it that I have reproduced it in its entirety below.

Paul Silas isn't getting around too well these days. His towering stature has been diminished by a slumping posture. He walks with a limp because of nerve problems in his left leg. And, in his most honest moment, he'd probably tell you he still has a sour taste in his mouth from being fired as head coach of the Cleveland Cavaliers in 2005.

Still, as he shuffled around the Warriors' downtown Oakland practice facility and Oracle Arena on game nights, his beaming smile couldn't be missed; the twinkle in his squinted eyes was unmistakable. He's spending time with his only son.

"It's the best thing I've ever been through," Silas, 65, said of watching his son, Stephen, at work. "I like to brag on him. To anybody I see, 'Well, you know my son is an assistant coach with the Warriors.' I just love it."

Stephen Silas, 35, is in his third season as an assistant coach with Golden State, his eighth season on an NBA bench. Still, he can't take five steps without someone bringing up his legendary father, a standout player for most of his 16 NBA seasons (1964-1980) and a member of three NBA championship teams. Sometimes, they ask about his dad before asking about him.
Sometimes, they don't say hello. Sometimes, they mistakenly call him Paul.

"There is not a night that goes by, home or on the road," Stephen explains, "where somebody doesn't ask how he's doing, say something about him, how great he is. I love it. I love it.
It never ever gets old. Referees, fans. Every night. 'How's he doing? Oh I saw him tonight. Tell him I said hello.' Asking for his address and all kinds of stuff. It's a little thing, but it really means a lot."

Paul and Stephen Silas are more like best friends than father and son. And their bond is something special, because it not only defies reality in the African-American family, it also survived the rigors of the NBA lifestyle.

"The one thing I admire more than anything," Paul said after a Warriors practice last month, "is that when he has problems he comes to his dad for advice. I couldn't go to my dad with my problems, but (Stephen) can come to me, and that just blows me away that we do have this relationship."

Paul can appear intimidating. As a player, he was a relative giant, known for his ability to throw around his 6-foot-7, 220-pound frame. Now, topping 300 pounds and carrying a legendary reputation, he looms even larger. His low-cut, salt-and-pepper 'fro and wrinkled mocha skin hints at his layers of experience.

As a player, he was bruising and gritty, as might be expected from someone who grew up idolizing Bill Russell. Silas was known for his defense and rebounding, two trademarks of the teams he coached.

Stephen is a less-imposing 6-foot-3 and might weigh 190 pounds in a wet denim tuxedo. His caramel complexion and youthful face is a tip o' the cap to his mom, Carolyn. His seemingly permanent smile is inviting and disarming.

Stephen was a finesse player who lived on his cerebral game and outside shooting stroke. His expertise now is offense and guard play, his area of emphasis with the Warriors.

"I like the contrast," Stephen said. "Being with him, and the stature he has, it's kind of hard to try to match it. That's tough to do. I was always comfortable being behind the scenes and being a little bit more quiet. So I don't feel any pressure or any inclination to be who I'm not. To be his son is great."

The Silases do share at least one trait: a dedicated work ethic.

Paul's perseverance was reflected in 12,357 career rebounds, 16th in NBA history. Stephen, too, is known for his grind.

His father gave him his start in coaching in Charlotte — first as a scout, then as an assistant coach — but he wasn't allowed to coast. Instead, his father made him work even harder, setting the tone for his budding coaching career.

"He understands how important it really is to be a step ahead," Warriors assistant coach Keith Smart said of Stephen, "and how much you have to work at it and prepare to do every single thing. From on the floor with players, to the one-on-one setting, to classroom film, to understanding the technologies of the game, to understanding the bench and managing the players. He has the whole package."

It's no surprise Stephen picked up those characteristics, inasmuch as he grew up idolizing his father. He memorized all his stats. He followed him around everywhere as a kid, to practice and to shoot-arounds. He soaked up all the stories.

He heard of his dad's days playing pickup games with the likes of Russell and K.C. Jones at DeFermery Park in west Oakland. He's fully aware of the 68-0 record and three Tournament of Champions titles McClymonds High won with Paul on its roster.
Stephen also heard about his dad's encounters with racism at Creighton University, about his classic stories of the ol' NBA and his on-the-court rivalry with Wes Unseld.

The pedestal upon which Stephen placed his father grew taller as Paul remained a reliable presence in his son's life. He attended most of Stephen's high school games and several college games, despite the demands of a hectic NBA schedule.

To this day, Stephen calls his father for advice, to vent, to glean bits of wisdom. Each time, Paul said, he gets warm and fuzzy inside. It's what the elder Silas always envisioned for his son, because he didn't have such a relationship with his own father.

"My father, although he was there, wasn't there," Paul said. "He was an alcoholic, and he never came to my games at all when I played, and I was the best player in Northern California at that time. I vowed that when my son grew up, I would always be there for him. And I was."

Paul beams with pride when he looks at Stephen. His son is a dedicated family man, an Ivy League graduate (Brown University), a hard-working professional. When Paul hears President Barack Obama imploring African-American men to man up, he knows the message is not addressed to his boy.

"It's because of him," Stephen said of his father. "His presence was always there. It was more I didn't want to disappoint him. To this day, I don't want to disappoint him. I think about that when things happen, I just don't want to disappoint my dad. That's something that's ingrained in me, and that's something that some kids don't have. It's hard to start without that base. It's hard to get to where you want to be without being held accountable for what you do and not having that role model teaching you the right way to be a man. I'm blessed to be able to have that."

Griffey is coming to Seattle, so much for Dad!

After sitting in a chair and strapped to the Apheresis machine for four and a half hours, I received a call from Mike, my youngest son saying, “Hey Dad. Did you hear that Griffey just signed on with Seattle today.” Then while I was talking to him, I could tell that someone else was trying to get through to me. When I hung up with Mike, I checked my missed calls and just as I thought, there was a call from Scott, our oldest son and I knew why he wanted to talk to me. Yes, he was calling to tell me the same thing about Ken Griffey Jr. So much for, “Hey Dad, how you doing?”

Now, don’t get upset with my two sons. The reason I say this is because I have two great sons. They both love the Lord and I know that they both love me. But, at the same time, they are just typical guys. I don’t see myself showing my dad a lot of concern had he gone to see the doctor when I was their age. In fact, let me tell you about my boys. Scott is a pastor of a church in Albany, Oregon and Mike is the head of the Math Department at what is now know as Corban College, formerly Western Baptist College in Salem, Oregon. God has blessed my wife and I with two wonderful sons.

Further, both boys love baseball. I was involved in Little League for ten years when they were little guys. One or the other was always on one of the teams that I coached during these years. My wife or I were at all of their home games from T-ball through college and even to most of their away games. We even flew south to watch them play baseball in Monterey, Mexico, when Scott was a senior in college and Mike was a freshman. And we were there when Scott played for Athletes in Action in Zagreb, Yugoslavia in the early nineties. And we can’t forget the portrait of Ken Griffey that my wife purchased several years ago that hung in our guest bedroom for a number of years, a portrait in which only five hundred copies were made. And how can I forget the night in 2005 that the three of us went to Seattle to get a bobble head of Ken Griffey on the tenth anniversary of the Mariners beating the Yankees in the American League playoffs (See Picture above).

So I set myself up for getting a call from the boys about Griffey rather than for them to find out how I made it through my first day on the Apheresis machine. Of course, I find this whole thing one of the laughable moments in the trial that I was going through. Besides, I think it was nice of them to call me anyhow to talk about something we had in common, namely baseball and our interest in Ken Griffey than just my health.

The Team and the Machine

On Tuesday, February 17, I was hooked up to the Apheresis machine to separate my blood into its components on the basis of weight. The machine can be used to obtain plasma (the liquid of the blood), platelets or white cells. For stem cell transplantation, white cells are collected, frozen and a small percentage of these white cells are stem cells, which can later restore bone marrow function, producing cells that eventually mature into red blood cells, white blood cells, and platelets.

The goal this week was to collect 2 million of these cells that could take up to five days. Things went well and I produced nearly 8 million of these cells! Now that this has taken place, I will receive a high dose of chemotherapy on March 10. The purpose of this procedure is to eliminate cancer cells. Then the collected cells will be thawed and transfused back into his body for the desired result.

And just this note. Gail Bradway of our church sent me her devotional prayers and thoughts this week again. And this week, she was reading Matthew 10 and wrote, "Jesus called twelve of His followers and sent them into the ripe fields. He gave them power to kick out the evil spirits and to tenderly care for the brusied and broken hurt lives." Then she prayed, "God may we at FBC be alert to the call. Thank you for the tender care our nurses (Oyin and Gail) are giving pastor." Then later she wrote about God's great attention to us, even numbering the hairs of our head. But then she crossed the phrase about the hairs on our head out and wrote in its place, "even numbering the white blood cell count!" Great application for this week!

What are we Going to do Now?

Hey, we’re going to Disneyland! Well, before that, my white counts has to go to 3000. This morning, it hit 1000. So in a couple of days, I should be ready. The next step is called Apheresis. This is the collection of immature hematopoietic cells from the blood. This is accomplished used a blood separating machine that sorts the blood cells. This happens as a small amount of blood is removed through one side if the catheter (or port). The blood is spun through a machine that will collect white blood cells and the remainder of the blood will be returned through the other side or the catheter. This process takes about four hours, for 2-5 consecutive days. After your peripheral blood stem cells are collected, they will be taken to the laboratory for processing and freezing.

Once this takes place, I will received the preparative regimen (high dose chemotherapy). The purpose of the preparation regimen is to eliminate cancer cells. The preparative regimen may be given as an inpatient or as an outpatient. The preparative regimen will take place over 2-10 days. Following this the transplant takes place. I will tell you about this after about 3 weeks as I see it from here.

Do you remember Gail Bradway who writes out her prayers? Here is a P.S. to one of her prayers. She writes, “ I’m thinkin’ in many respects this ordeal will be harder for Koyce than David—it’s very hard to be a spectator and comforter when you can’t really relate because she hasn’t had a stem-cell transplant –she’s got to have such grace, God—and no problem right?! You’re the grace-giver!”

A Card, "I Thought You Could Use a Lift."

My good friend Ginger Munck may have thought that I was really down. So she writes saying, "Keep loooking up!" Good advice for us all. I thought you would enjoy this. But I like the note I got from Don and Daly Young too. Dan is working in Denver and Daly is working here in our area. Pray for them too and their courage at this time. And be encouraged as I have been with reading what Dan wrote:

David and Koyce:

You two are an inspiration to all of us. This is a pretty formidable foe for both of you. Whether you think it shows or not (because of your human trepidation) you are demonstrating your lifelong faith and preparation in the Lord.

I have always been taken by the saying that, "It ain't courage if the fear isn't present." You two display an uncommon courage and it is inspiring and instructional to have this in our lives in the church and have both of you show us the way.

You walk the walk and talk the talk. You literally practice what you preach and I can't tell you how powerful that is for us to see that. If you think that you fall short, think again. You have our trust and love.

We, in the congregation, all need to understand the blessings we have. I believe that most of us do. The very fact that we have a life to begin with and fullness of it that we have been granted is a comfort. I have said to you before, that if I never receive another blessing, I still will have received a far greater share than I deserve....God is indeed good! God is indeed great!

Yet the greatest blessing is to be in Christ as both of you are. There is no greater blessing and, in its absence, none other matters. This is a gift which you, yourselves, have received AND have turned around and given it countless times to others. I'll bet you would have a hard time recounting how many times others have come to Christ and have been saved because both of you chose the path of our Lord.

I'll bet also that you have no idea of how many and in whom you have planted the seeds and/or made the ground of their hearts and minds fertile to later receive this true and one gift that matters.

Even more, what of the comforts and insights and support you have given to your families and congregations and acquaintances and friends AND strangers throughout at least fifty years.


If there is a measure of lives well-lived, I would think that yours would certainly be a measure without question. Yes, we all have our doubts and would-do-it-overs if we could...

On balance, you are unable to deny that you have been a blessing to this world.

On reflection, you must confirm that you have followed your good hearts to Christ and He will keep you now and well in His Plans.

On faith, you will see this through and be at peace and secure in His love and care of you.

I will be returning/visiting the Bay in the next couple of months. I fully expect to see both of you when I do so you can tell me firsthand of what God had done and how good He is.

Our prayers and thoughts are with you.

We love you.

A Bump On the Head on the Bend in the Road

Toward the end of the week, I was cleaning up my mess around my dest and I took a small box to the closest where I have had my office. But as I laid the box down, the box fell off the stuff I had placed it on and I turned to catch it before it hit the floor. In the meantime, my body was out of sink and I tripped over my slippers and my head hit the closet opeining. Although I was wearing a cap, it still roughed some skin off the top of my head and it started bleeding.

When Nurse Oyin stopped by, she helped take care of my head and checked out the other parts of my catheter. The next morning, I went up to the hospital to see how my platelets and white blood count were coming along. Laurie, my nurse that is pictured above was somewhat alarmed by the situation as the while cells were at 300 for the third day and they should be between 4500 and 10,000. And the platelets and red cell were down too and since they wanted clotting to take place with the open sore on my head and the while cells were down so low, they couldn’t fight the possible infection for the head. For the first time, they were talking about such a would, if not handled properly, could be fatal. Now, they had my attention! So, I was given 2 units of blood and one unit olf platelets. I got to the hospital at 10:00 and got an exam of the head and then the units of platelots and blood took another five or so hours. Fortunately, it was Saturday and I was able to catch the UCLA/Arizona game and the Cal and Stanford game. In the meantime, I nned to be extremely careful not to get any kind of infections since the next step is to go to Stanford for the Apheresis treatement which is the next step.

Then Koyce went got me a Chinese Chicken and Sesame dinner and they micro waived it in their oven. Then we went home and hald a Pork Tenderloin and potatoes with cords and apple sauce for a Valentine Dinner. It wasn’t as great a day for Valentines as we had in the Mania Hotel four years earlier after we got bumped in the Philippines. But the day turned out well and we walked away convinced and wonderfully we are made and how important it is to take extra care with our bodied.

Being Valentine’s Day, our good friend Dorothy Moore that we knew from El Cerrito times wrote to say, My Dear Friends, I am praying much for you both and on this Valentine’s Day. I want to tell you that I love you dearly and praise God for you and your work for your Lord. I am with you in spirit while you are going through these tough days. And God is always faithful and I am so glad we have him to rely on. Sincerely with love and prayers, Dorothy (Moore). (Jeremiah 33:3).” What a sweet friend. This gave us an opportunity to talk about how she changed our life some 50 years before. Praise God for good and loyal friends throughout the years.

Wonder When they are Going to Let me Go Home?

Last week, I spent a night in the Stanford Hospital after taking in Cytaxin through my new port. But I kept wonderdering when they where going to tell me how I was doing and whether I could go hom.e It reminded of this story below. I think you will enjoy it: (Oh, by the way, it gets cold in the hospital at nights but I brought one of my caps from home! You sleep better this way).

A sweet grandmother telephoned the Hospital.
She timidly asked, 'Is it possible to speak to someone who can tell me how a patient is doing?'
The operator said 'I'll be glad to help, dear.
What's the name and room number?' The grandmother in her weak tremulous voice said, 'Norma Findlay, Room 302.'
The operator replied, 'Let me place you on hold while I check with her nurse.' After a few minutes the operator returned to the phone and said, 'Oh, I have good news, her nurse just told me that Norma is doing very well.
Her blood pressure is fine; her blood work just came back as normal and her physician, Dr. Cohen, has scheduled her to be discharged on Tuesday.'
The grandmother said, 'Thank you. That's wonderful!
I was so worried! God bless you for the good news.'
The operator replied, 'You're more than welcome. Is Norma your daughter?'
The grandmother said, 'No, I'm Norma Findlay in 302. No one tells me anything!'

My Two Great Christian Nurses in our Church

Who would have thought that in my travels in Lagos, Nigereria in 1978, the one day, Oyin Ajala would be in our church in Walnut Creek and would stop over a few times a week to check out my Catheter? Oyin studied in Philadelphia but now resides in Walnut Creek and works for Kaiser Hospital in San Francicsco and is an intructor of career nurses in nearby Antioch. Koyce has been a little nervous as my caregiver but Oyin has releaved all those fears by showing her how to clean the catheter and the lines that are done daily. We are so fortunate to have Oyin worshipping with us as well as another nurse, Gail Barbitta. Both of them are God-sents to help us during this procedure.
Gail was a former teacher at our Academy before she became a nurse. She is a great help as well in checking me out. In her spare time, she watches over her daugther Jennene who also has been diagnozed with cancer. Her web site is: http://dontwastemycancer.wordpress.com/. It is a great site and she has some good things on it. Some of you who went to Western in its El Ceritto days will remember Gail. She attended Grace Baptist in Richmond and now is a member of our church in Walnut Creek. Thank God for these ladies and their spiritual gifts.

Every Church needs a Jim and Gail Bradway

Jim retired a few years ago and he didn’t stop working. Jim heads up our campus oversight and just doesn’t quit. He not only knows his business but he has a wonderful spirit, keeping all the church people happy along with the faculty and staff of our Preschool kids through eighth graders.

Gail is also talented. She has done a lot of painting around the church such as our front sign and a Murrow on the building next to our quad. But Gail is a person who knows how to pray along with her artistic abilities. This week she handed me as pastor some of her prayers. She usually writes them out, puts a red marker on them when they are answered and then burns them as she asks God to accept them as a sweet savor of incense to Himself.

In one of her prayer notes, she wrote to me saying, “And by the way, that series you just injected, it was for you, yes, and for all of us who have hard times, but it helped us all to get on the same page with you as you go thru this—we could see your thot processes—we could relate to these first steps in stem cell transplant….Pastor is so human—brave yet fearful; realistic but hopeful. What I still think and appreciate deeply, AND I TOLD YOU THIS way back when I helped him announce the cancer with “Little cardboard David.” Is that he takes sooo much care to try to ease our anxiety as a flock, when he’s got to be hurting so much himself. How Christ like. I was so impressed when the prayers over them today—Esther’s history lesson, Calvin’s “from everlasting to everlasting you are God.” I don’t know how anyone could have walked away not being blessed and it really wasn’t to be that way….really we were praying over him and blessing your love. The praise was yours again….P.S. I’m thinkin’ in many respects this ordeal will be harder for Koyce than David—it’s very hard to be a spectator and comforter when you can’t really relate because she hasn’t had a stem-cell transplant—she’s gotta have such grace, God—no problem right? You’re the grace-giver!

As Gail read and prayed in Genesis over Abraham’s servant prayer to God, she wrote, “O God of my Master Abraham, (then she crossed it out and inserted the name David). Make things go smoothly this day—treat my master Abraham (i.e., David—well!) So you know me that you’re working graciously behind the scenes for my master.” What a beautiful verse God—I’m claiming that one also! When he gives you the credit each day for victories, we’ll all know your’re graciously working behind the scenes for him!

There was more but I was so blessed in just these few pages I wanted to share these words with some of my dear friends who are also upholding me in prayer.

Into Your Hands, I Commit My Spirit................. (Psalm 31:5a)

One picture is worth a thousand words, right? And this one above depicts so well the providential care of God over the crew and passengers of US Airways Flight 1549 that crashed into the Hudson River on January 17, 2009. The cartoon was done by Rex Babin of the Sacramento Bee and sent to me by Gail Barbitta and Tina Short in our church. The Association Press wrote that officials and passengers are praising the cool-headed US Airways pilot from the Bay Area, (Danville-right next to Walnut Creek) who maneuvered his crippled jet and ditched it in New York's frigid Hudson River. All 155 people on board survived. The pilot was 57-year-old Chesley B. Sullenberger III.

Sullenberger's wife, in Danville, told CNN that she was stunned to hear the news from her husband after it was all over. "I hadn't been watching the news. I've heard Sully say to people, 'It's rare for an airline pilot to have an incident in their career,' " said Lori Sullenberger.
"When he called me he said, 'There's been an accident.' At first I thought it was something minor, but then he told me the circumstances and my body started shaking and I rushed to get our daughters out of school." Chelsey Sullenberger, 58, is a former fighter pilot who runs a safety consulting firm in addition to flying commercial aircraft. Witnesses say the pilot appeared to guide the Airbus A320 down. Bob Read, a TV producer who saw the plane go into the water, says it appeared to be a "controlled descent."

Passenger Joe Hart says after both engines cut out, the pilot actually "floated" the plane into the river. He calls the pilot's performance "phenomenal."…Sullenberger…started his own consulting business, Safety Reliability Methods, two years ago. He also flew F-4 fighter jets with the Air Force in the 1970s. The plane, an Airbus A320 that had taken off minutes earlier from LaGuardia Airport bound for Charlotte, N.C., was submerged up to its windows in the river when rescuers arrived in Coast Guard vessels and ferries. Some passengers waited in water up to their knees, standing on the wing of the plane for help.

"We had a miracle on 34th Street. I believe now we have had a miracle on the Hudson," Govenor David Paterson said.

Another person was quoted as saying, “To GOD be the glory that there has been no loss of life at this moment.” The majority of the passengers, walked off under their own power. And this is how I viewed the rest of the week. It was as if God was watching over me and holding me up too.

On Tuesday morning at 9 AM, we were at the hospital and they were waiting for me. By 10 AM all the questions and papers were done and I was dressed up with my hospital robe and my yellow socks. Yellow socks? I thought I would get red socks being at Stanford for that is their school color. But bright yellow or gold is one of the colors of the Cal Bears, their most fearful rival. When the doctor came in, he noticed my college class ring and asked what college I gone to. I told him it was Western Baptist. He said nothing so I asked him where he went to college and he said Stanford and Harvard before going to San Diego State and then returning to Stanford. So I guess he was a pretty smart dude. And that’s nice to know when a guy is going to do surgery on me!

They rolled me into the room, put a cover over my face, sedated me a little to deaden the pain and inserted into the upper chest wall (the space between your collarbone and the breast) a catheter to make chemotherapy easier and more comfortable as well as to take out the stem cells and to bring them back in. When the procedure is over, the catheter will be removed quickly in another same-day procedure. Now there is no need to find a vein every time I get chemo or have the the transplant. This procedure involves a special needle fitting right into the port, so all you feel is the stick—not the poking, prodding, and false tries in one’s arm. The nurse numbed the skin first to lessen any feeling at all. And that’s it. We were given a sandwich and drink and headed back to the hotel for a rest. Later, we went down to the nearby Kaiser hospital, saw an Italian restaurant that had been in business for 56 years called Frankie, Johnie and Luigi located near the Kaiser hospital in Mountain Blue where we picked up all of our meds. We had great dinner that we split and desert. The dinner included a minestrone soup, veal scaloppini and since it was my last meal before entering the hospital, we decided to have a flaky crust Dutch apple pie with berries and ice cream. Both parts of the meal were delicious and the price was quite reasonable.

On Thursday, we arrived at 9 AM and finally got the chemo going about 5:30 PM. The chemo was Cytoxan. It was the heaviest dose of chemo that I have ever had. They really don’t tell you much about the drug but they do explain the side effects. Almost immediately, I started sneezing, then I felt pressure around my eyes and forehead within an hour, I had to hit the pot for the loose stool. Other effects to look out for were irritation of the bladder wall which causes bleeding. As a result, I was told to start drinking three quarts of water each day for several months up through the infusion. Since I wasn’t feeling a hundred percent, I quit working on my computer and went to sleep. Of course, ever hour and a half or two hours, I was awakened to check some things out. But then I was back to sleep almost immediately.

The man next to me did not fair as well and had to stay in the hospital until he would start eating. The doctor whose parents were from Czeckloslovakia came in and we had a great talk. (My mother was from the (Hungry-Czech Empire), and said everything looked good and then told me I could go home. I had three meals during my stay. They were actually very good and not what we usually hear about hospital food. For an example, I was given orange juice, oatmeal with brown sugar and raisins, fruited yogurt, hot cocoa, blueberry pancakes with syrup and strawberry jam and mini cranberry scone. This was probably better than the free breakfast that Denny’s gave to customers this past week! Then the nurses came in to go over our drugs, got a shot of benadryl and I gave myself three shots of neupogen. We had a final visit too from the Dietian, then the nurse wanted to watch Koyce clean the catheter. But before we left, I was fitted with a HEPA face mask. But, the HEPA filters came in pink. Now just remember, I am also carrying a purse to contain my camera, wallet, cards etc, and now these pink things. So, just remember that I could be a little sensitive about this on a bad day. Oh, well, I will send you a picture of it shortly. Tonight we are at home to recover and take some shots for the next week and I won’t be speaking or being around a ground of people for at least three Sundays.

They are Out for Blood!

February 3 was a busy day at the Medical Center. First, I was sent to the lab and they gathered up 15 tubes of blood. This is the picture above. I then took an ECG or what is also called an EKG and had a Chest X-ray. Then we both took a class on how to clean the Catheter that I will be placed with later this week. Yes, I can now tell people that I have taken classes at Western Baptist Bible College, 2 seminaries and at Stanford! We also met with our Doctor and our Nurse coordinator. Then, we visited a home where Koyce will stay while I am in the hospital. We will tell you more about this situation a little later on. We will be back at the Center on Tuesday through Friday noon. I will explain more probably on Friday.

Church Sending us off to The Hospital

After I spoke this morning, February 1, our board chair came up and asked a few others from our congregation to pray. I had five points in my message and each one took one of the points and weaved it into their prayer. It was a very touching moment to our service this morning. Below are the people and the prayers that we offered up to the Lord:

Our board chair Calvin Fei came up and said, “As you know, Pastor and Koyce will be going to Stanford quite soon and we want to have a special time of prayer so I have asked several members to join me in prayer and please, please pray along with me if you would. Lord, heavenly Father, we praise you for who you are. Lord, we don’t know exactly why Pastor is going through these trails with Hodgkin’s Lymphoma, we really do not understand that but this we do know Lord, from everlasting to everlasting Thou art God. And Lord, we know that you are righteous and you will bring the victory out of this situation. We pray for your special protection around Pastor and Koyce. We pray that you are their fortress and their hiding place. And yet even more, we pray that you will wrap your feathers around them. Help them to experience your love and closeness during this time. We also pray that we as a congregation can be an extension of those feathers Lord, that our prayers will actually be felt by them and our love and our actions will show that love. And for that, we will give you the glory.”

Then Clayton Ross, chair of the pulpit committee when I came to the church a little over eight years ago prayed, “It is so good Lord to know that you always do what is right. It is so good to know that you work all things together for good to those that love thee and are called according to your purpose. Here is a couple that has long ago committed themselves to serving you in whatever way you called them to. And then they committed themselves to us when we needed a Pastoral couple to come and stay with us. Thank you Lord for their commitment. May we gladly renew our commitment to them, to pray for them, to offer them our support, to see what their needs are and help them to meet those needs. Lord, we are people who tend to forget our commitments. May we Lord be fully devoted to this couple for your amazing glory.

Gail Bradway, one of our prayer warriors at the church prayed, “God, Pastor and Koyce have enemies that are looming very large right now—cancer, fear, discouragement and weakness. But the psalmist had the same fears and the same enemies. And he said, ‘My enemies turned to you and ran and stumbled unto you God and then they fell on their faces.’ So that’s what we are asking for Pastor and Koyce that these enemies will turn to you and run and they will stumble on Almighty God and fall on their faces and the reason we are asking this is because the psalmist went on to say, ‘I am thanking you God with a full heart, I am whistling and laughing and jumping for joy and I am writing the book of your wonders and singing your song High God, full of praises because of what you have done. Amen.’”

Then a good friend and a faithful servant Esther Bishop prayed, “Dear heavenly Father. We want to review your compassion as we heard in the message today. And I am thinking that in Lamentations you say, ‘Your compassions never fail. They are new every morning’ and your faithfulness is so great. In Exodus, you told us that you are the compassionate and gracious God abounding in love and faithfulness. In Psalms, you tell us that as a Father has compassion on his children, so the Lord has compassion on those that fear him. And I am thinking now back to the Old Testament as the Israelites were in Egypt, how you heard and saw the suffering and how you had compassion on them and you came to their rescue. And I also thought about how in the New Testament when Jesus walked this earth, he had compassion on all of those around him, the masses. He saw their suffering, he saw their hurts, he saw their sickness. And Lord, we think again how he was merciful and gracious to them. I think that each one of us can look in our own lives and our journey of life and see the roads with its turns and twists and we can each one testify and review and remember your compassion to us. And now Lord, we also think of Pastor and Koyce and how many times they have told us how compassionate and gracious you have been to them through their walk through life together through many twists and turns. So here now Lord is another hairpin turn and a very serious one and we just commit them to you and we know that you are not going to change now and that you are going to be compassionate and gracious, thankful and loving and you will be there for every step and every turn. And we just pray that the people surrounding them, their caretakers, their doctors, everyone that they deal with also show them such love and compassion. And we also pray that our church will step up to the plate and will just surround them with love, compassion and our prayers. And we know that you have promised to never leave us or forsake us.”

Then Ken Mindrup, one of our leaders and one who speaks the most for me when I am away prayed, “Lord, we are so thankful for these choice servants of yours here. Lord, we do look back and see how you have provided for them and how you have provided for us and the witness you have given us to watch, to show the authenticity of what they believe and the authenticity of their God. And Lord, we thank you for that example and we thank you for allowing Pastor and Koyce to walk through this and the ability for us to learn and grow in our faith to be strengthened because of what we see here. Lord, we know that you have a future and hope as Pastor even said in his last point and we are excited to see what you will bring in that. And we pray for his testimony and his witness even there at Stanford as he is there and as he walks through this and the lives that will be touched. Not only the lives that they have touched here in this congregation but the other lives that will be touched even through this process. We thank you for that. And Lord we pray that we may grow and grow in our love toward you and our thankfulness toward you and toward Pastor and Koyce. So we thank you for the opportunities as examples to show our faith and our trust in the future and hope that you have for us and this church. We thank you for this in Christ’s name, Amen.