Surviving Life's Curves

Today, January 29, I received in the mail a card from my good friends Elton and Audrey from the church. It was such a neat card. First, it fits with my series I am bringing at the church dealing with Surviving Life's Curves. Also, it fits well with the theme of this web site. Maybe you noticed the straight lines coming off the bridge and then immediately going into the curves. (Scroll down and I will talk about straight lines and curves and bends in the road). On the top of the site represents making a straight line to the doctor. Do you see the Stethoscope on the far right of the road?

Koyce and I paid a visit to The Stanford Medical Center today to sign some papers and firm up some dates. Beginning next week, I get a catheter put in and placed, take a class on self-injection, take another class on "teaching for transplant," take chemotherapy called Cytoxan, get my mask and begin the shots of Neupogen and Antibiotics. We also learned that I will be part of a Research Study and that I will be monitored there annually for the rest of my life. It was a tough session and before we were through, they had Koyce getting a bit weapy. Then the nurse said, "Look, if I don't scare you, I am not really doing my job." Well, today, she was doing her job!

As to our schedule, the second week of February is a stay at home week just taking Nepogen and wearing the mask, thus no preaching for a few weeks. On the 16th I begin taking Apheresis that takes place at Stanford. On about March 17, I enter the hospital with the transplant beginning on the 23rd and I will remain in the hospital there for 2-3 weeks. Following this, I stay in the safe zone over there where I can be close to the hospital for daily check ups that will probably run about another two weeks. After this, I can return home and start the process of recovering. I will keep you updated along this part of the journey.

When I returned home from Stanford today, there was a letter from Kaiser that said, "No clear evidence of cancer on the PET scan." So, I am clean today but we are going ahead with the process in order to keep the cancer from coming back. There is only a 40% chance that the cancer will not come back if I stop the process at this point. We desire better odds than that so we signed unto the process today.

Visited my Oncologist Today

Here I am with Dr. Sattar who released me to The Stanford Medical Center today, January 27, and I will not see him again until sometime in May or June. He looked over all my tests and told me that everything looked normal--the heart which they emailed me from Stanford and told me that I had a lovely heart--the bone marrow test, the respiratory system and the PET scan. In fact, there was no evidence from the PET scan of any cancer! The two cycles of chemo has apparently killed it at this point. I could walk away from it all right now, but the chances of the cancer not returning are about 40%. But we want better odds than that and our hope is that the Stem Cell Transplant will rid us of this disease. On Thursday of this week, we will be at Stanford and then a busy week will follow over there beginning on February 2.

A Break at Christmas

Because we had a three week break from chemotherapy, our thought was to go to Oregon and see our kids and then go up to our cabin at Black Butte Ranch. However, the weather was not conducive to such a trip so we decided to take our Korean Kids and spend a couple of days and nights in the city. The picture above is at Neiman Marcus across from Union Square.

On Christmas Day, we left our hotel and drove down the crooked street and ended up of all places at The Stinking Rose, a restaurant in the Italian district when the place reaks with garlic.

The next day we went to Pier 39 and walked on the Golden Gate Bridge. Then we topped off the day by a visit to Ghiradellis for ice cream.

It was a great break for the treatment and we had a good time. Fortunately, we were able to spend Thanksgiving a month earlier with our kids and grandkids at Shasta City, just above Redding.

Getting to Know us

OUR CHILDREN

As to our children, we have two sons. Scott is our first born who graduated from Western Baptist College, now Corban College, in Salem Oregon. Upon finishing his Master’s degree at the University of Portland, he served for fifteen years as a Principal for a Christian school. In July of 2008, the Willamette Community Church of Albany, Oregon called him to become their senior pastor. Scott married Angela Patten and they have three children, Adam, Madison and Ashley.

Our son Mike also graduated from Western and received his degree in Math. Mike holds a Master’s degree from Oregon State University and has been a professor of Math at Corban College in Salem, Oregon for the past fifteen years. He married Katie Parker and they have two children, Morgan and Randall. Katie works for the Albany Christian school where Scott was the Principal and they attend the church where Scott pastors.

In the picture below, Scott is on the right side of the stairs with his family and Mike is on the left with his.

OUR KOREAN CHILDREN

In addition, we have two Korean children living with us in California. About two years ago, we met Jun (pronounced June) at the San Francisco airport who had arrived in the Bay Area to attend Berean Christian High School and to live with at our home. Both she and her parents wanted her to be in a Christian school and to find a place
where she could stay. In conversation with Dr. John Song, whom we had met about ten years earlier, he told them that he knew of the perfect school and the perfect place for her to stay. A semester later her brother Jack arrived to start his freshman year at Berean. Then this past fall, David Park, a fifth grader, was accepted at the Walnut Creek Christian Academy, the school of First Baptist Church, and he moved into our household as well.

OUR SITUATION WITH CANCER

At the moment I have had my Hodgkin’s Lymphoma Cancer reoccur and if you want to follow what is happening with this, browse around where you can have the latest information on where we are with respect to coming upon our curve in the road. Also, you can find some of our thoughts on this and what we are thinking at the present time. Thanks for checking in on us and we trust that you will be enjoy and be encouraged with this site.

A Week of Tests

January 19-23

This week I took another CAT, PET and Bone Marrow test. The following Sunday I asked the people at church how many had ever had a Cat Scan. Many of them had not. So I told them that I could give them a scan right there. I put on the screen a picture of a cat with its eyes going back and forth and told them to stare at the cat for 10 seconds. Then following this picture a sign came up that said "Thank you." Then it said, "Your cat scan is now complete." In the next picture was a picture of a cat just laughing its fool head off! It got a laught anyhow. Former Pastor Ralph Canfield from Washington state wrote me and said, "How did you know that I needed a cat scan?" I guess he can now tell his doctor that he got the test and he won't have to pay any co-pay! Then he said he was praying for me and gave me a quote from Dr. R.T. Ketcham who said, "We have a Heavenly Father who is too wise ever to make a mistake, and too good ever to be unkind." A great quote.

The most interesting test was the bone marrow test. Actually, I had a sense of anxiety this week when I went in for the test. You see, I had one of these tests about 3 years ago. It was not fun. The doctor told me that what they were going to do was to go in through my back side where I sit and he was going to take his needle and go down until they hit bone and then break some of it off and bring the broken piece back out. He said that it was painful and I needed to just lie on my stomach and hold on to the bars in front of me. I said, “Aren’t you going to use an anesthetic?” He said, “Nope, Otherwise I can’t feel when I hit the bone but the good news is, it only lasts for 7 seconds.” And I have to tell you, that I think that was the longest 7 seconds I have ever experienced. So, when I went in this time, the woman who was going to torture me asked how I was doing. I said, “I am a little apprehensive about this” and she asked, “Why?” I told her about my last experience and told her that I have told a number of my friends about this and each one of them has told 10 other people how painful this was. At this she said, “There will be no pain. I use an anesthetic and this will be nothing like what you experienced before. And sure enough, the whole procedure was a piece of cake. There was a night and day difference betwen the two. And when it was over, She said, “Will you now go back and tell your friends that it was really nothing?” And I said, “I will tell my whole church about it and I am sure that they will tell 10 others that it was nothing to be anxious about.” So I told the church the following Sunday and used this as an illustration to them that the lesson I learned from this was—There are times we are anxious about what we are going to go through but often when we come out the other end, it was anything to worry about.

Also, I received an email on Sunday morning from Ed Biser in the midwest and it fit what I was speaking about from Psalm 16. Listen to what the poem said. It was entitled, A Bend in the Road. A Bend In The Road:

Each day we have trials or triumphs,
Have joy or burdens to bear.
Whether days are stressful or calm
I know God's love is there.

I won't let dark clouds surround me,
I'll find a brighter day.
I'll leave my doubts behind me as,
I journey on my way.


I know that He does lead me in,
The pathway I may take.
Because I've come to Him in prayer,
In decisions I must make.

Now there’s a bend in the road but,
God's presence will remain.
He'll help me get where I belong,
And make me glad I came.

Cancer's Unexpected Blessings

When you enter the Valley of the Shadow of Death, things change.
Tony Snow posted 7/20/2007 02:30PM in Christianity Today.

Commentator and broadcaster Tony Snow announced that he had colon cancer in 2005. Following surgery and chemo-therapy, Snow joined the Bush administration in April 2006 as press secretary. Unfortunately, on March 23 Snow, 51, a husband and father of three, announced that the cancer had recurred, with tumors found in his abdomen—leading to surgery in April, followed by more chemotherapy. Snow went back to work in the White House Briefing Room on May 30, but resigned August 31. CT asked Snow what spiritual lessons he has been learning through the ordeal.

Blessings arrive in unexpected packages—in my case, cancer. Those of us with potentially fatal diseases—and there are millions in America today—find ourselves in the odd position of coping with our mortality while trying to fathom God’s will. Although it would be the height of presumption to declare with confidence What It All Means, Scripture provides powerful hints and consolations.

The first is that we shouldn’t spend too much time trying to answer the why questions: Why me? Why must people suffer? Why can’t someone else get sick? We can’t answer such things, and the questions themselves often are designed more to express our anguish than to solicit an answer.

I don’t know why I have cancer, and I don’t much care. It is what it is—a plain and indisputable fact. Yet even while staring into a mirror darkly, great and stunning truths begin to take shape. Our maladies define a central feature of our existence: We are fallen. We are imperfect. Our bodies give out.

But despite this—because of it—God offers the possibility of salvation and grace. We don’t know how the narrative of our lives will end, but we get to choose how to use the interval between now and the moment we meet our Creator face-to-face.

Second, we need to get past the anxiety. The mere thought of dying can send adrenaline flooding through your system. A dizzy, unfocused panic seizes you. Your heart thumps; your head swims. You think of nothingness and swoon. You fear partings; you worry about the impact on family and friends. You fidget and get nowhere.

To regain footing, remember that we were born not into death, but into life—and that the journey continues after we have finished our days on this earth. We accept this on faith, but that faith is nourished by a conviction that stirs even within many nonbelieving hearts—an intuition that the gift of life, once given, cannot be taken away. Those who have been stricken enjoy the special privilege of being able to fight with their might, main, and faith to live—fully, richly, exuberantly—no matter how their days may be numbered.

Third, we can open our eyes and hearts. God relishes surprise. We want lives of simple, predictable ease—smooth, even trails as far as the eye can see—but God likes to go off-road. He provokes us with twists and turns. He places us in predicaments that seem to defy our endurance and comprehension—and yet don’t. By his love and grace, we persevere. The challenges that make our hearts leap and stomachs churn invariably strengthen our faith and grant measures of wisdom and joy we would not experience otherwise.

What Kind of Transplant will this be?

The type of Transplant is called Autologous where David serves as his own donor. What is involved is that his immature hematopoietic (blood) cells, often called stem cells, are collected and stored before he can proceed to the transplant. Once the cells are collected and stored, he will receive a high dose chemotherapy. The purpose of this regimen is to eliminate cancer cells. Following this, David’s cells will be infused and this is his transplant. Then it will take about fourteen days for the cells to begin to produce new mature blood cells. As he begins to make new blood cells, his body will heal and he will begin to feel better. Approximately 30 days following the transplant, if all is going well, David will be able to return home. Recovery from an autologous transplant can take up to six months or more. His hair will begin to regrow in about three months. His taste buds will return to normal in about four months but his energy will remain low for a long period of time. Sounds like fun, uh?

Responses to my Updates

sherrill, on January 9th, 2009 at 6:13 pm Said:

I like you with no hair…. You look like a baby face…..Younger too. love you and praying for you. me

Marty, on January 9th, 2009 at 8:18 pm Said:

We’re all praying! You have to keep making those good memories in my life, you know Marty

W Bellshaw, on January 9th, 2009 at 11:40 pm Said:

Dear Dave & Koyce:
Thanks for the info. Helps me to pray more intelligently, and, hopefully, more intelligently. When you get well, I can stop praying?? Don’t want to bother God unnecessarily!!!

T Harshman Ireland, on January 13th, 2009 at 9:50 pm Said:

Dear David and Koyce,I was glad to read the update on how you are doing. My family and I will be praying for you. You do look good without any hair.

Every Journey hits a Major Curve in the Road

In a book that has meant much to us, the author has written these words: “We are a people who like straight lines. We want our careers to take a straight line from the bottom to the top, our relationships to move consistently from good to better, and our lifestyles to just keep improving. Yet that never happens. It is only a matter of time until every journey through life hits a major curve in the road” (An Extravagant Mercy, by M. Craig Barnes).

David Jeremiah, in his book entitled, A Bend in the Road–Experiencing God when your World Caves In speaks of having the same kind of cancer that David has. He was first treated in 1994 but then it reoccured in 1998 and he ended up with a Stem Cell Transplant. Now ten years later, David heard him speak in the Bay Area and he was running along on all eight cylinders. The book has been an encouragement to David as he has learned a little about what he would be facing in a matter of weeks.

For instance, in one section of the book, he writes under the subheading, Three o’clock in the morning that “At that darkest and most dismal of hours, there may be no silence deeper than the silence of a hospital corridor.” He writes, “During my stay at Green Hospital, (that’s a hospital in San Diego) I became closely acquainted with the time and the desolate feeling of it.” Then he tells about being on morphine and saying, “My reaction to the drug was a waking nightmare of confusion and disorientation. I could only manage short periods of sleep punctuated by sudden, startled consciousness—like being shaken violently awake. After this jarring sensation, I would be unsure where I was, what day it might be, or what was happening to me. That was the pattern of my life, moments of sleep, moments of confusion. It lasted for about five days that all blurred together like an unpleasant dream.” Then he said, “The nights were worst, of course, they were long and dark and lonely. I remember waking abruptly one night, looking around with grogginess at the bed and the darkened room, and doing the best I could to get my bearings. There was nothing on my mind, with the exception of a Scripture passage that seemed to be lingering in wait for me.” And the passage of scripture was Psalm 71 so he grabbed his Bible and the passage brought to him both comfort and assurance.

And if this happens to me in the middle of the night, David said that he may look at this psalm too, but he knows that his is going to read Psalm 121 where we read that God will provide safety for him during the terrors of the night and that God will never leave his side. To be sure, we will face a bend in the road, or a curve if you wish, but we know that God is always there with us and is our help. A poem that means much to us, that was sent by a good friend and former missionary Bill Lancaster who had cancer, goes this way:

Sometimes we come to life’s crossroads,
And we view what we think is the end.

But God has a much wider vision
And he knows that it’s only a bend—

The road will go on and get smoother
And after we’ve stopped for a rest,

The path that lies hidden beyond us
is often the path that is best.

So rest and relax and grow stronger,
Let go and let God share your load.

And have faith in a brighter tomorrow.
You’ve just come to a bend in the road.

Isn’t that great? We might think it’s the end, but it is only a bend in the road.

Middle of January 2009

January 16

Today I had a echo stress test. This would involve being on the treadmill with them increasing the grade and the speed. Actually, I was a little apprehensive about this since I hadn’t done one of these for at least ten years. But, I grabbed my sugar free gum and went for it. In the end, it was a piece of cake. I saw the pictures and the cardiologist said that I had good heart function and there was no evidence of any blockages. A couple of days later, my nurse coordinator emailed me from the Stanford Medical Center and said that she just got the echo results ”and in case you didn’t know it, you have a lovely heart!” So, the next time someone tells me that they think I don’t have heart, I will quote her words! And by the way, I did a seminar on being Heart Healthy at the Western States Conference in Bremerton last April and if you would like a copy of my presentation, I can email it to you. This is a good report for ten years ago, I had a bypass and usually they last only about ten years. So, while I was apprehensive about going, I was sure glad with the results. On Friday, I had a respiratory test and that seemed to go well too. In about a week and a half, I should be near to getting my schedule for the stem cell transplant at The Stanford Medical Center.

January 13

Since I lost almost of of my hair the previous week, on Sunday I told the church that having a bald head is like heaven is a bright and shiny place and there is no parting or dieing there. I also told them that God only made a few perfect heads and the rest he put hair on. And then I asked, “Do you know where all the hair goes when a man goes bald? It all goes inward and grows out his nose and ears!”

January 12
Now, wait until they see me next Sunday. For this morning, I received package in the mail from my good friend Ernie Clark in Texas. It was a hat with hair growing out the top. I will be wearing it next Sunday. Look and see what I am talking about: The hair on top is both black and white.

Sunday, January 11

Sunday was a great day at Walnut Creek. Yes, I am still at the pulpit. Last week’s message was, A Bend in the Road is not the End. Yesterday, it was, A Crash in the Road in not the End either. I told the story of how a girl driving on the wrong side of the road hit another vehicle and incapacited a driver coming the other way for a whole year. What was mind buggling was that I invited the mother of the girl, who had put the daughter out for adoption when she was 16, to speak on the events of the past year. There was not a dry eye in the service. But what we learned is that when we encounter a crash in our lives, our lives are not over. God somehow works in our lives and causes us who are weeping in the night to again have joy in the morning and us who are mourning to once again dance. The message was taken from Psalm 30. And David who was hurting healthwise saw the day in which he was healed. It was a great service because, the man was hit in the crash came to know the Lord and the girl started a ministry in junior highs and high schools about drinking. And even the mother learned how to forgive her daughter whom she had reunited with just 12 years earlier. One of the things we learned is that often things happen in our lives in order to grow.

Listen to this quote in Ron Mehl's book Surprise Endings says that says, "Someone had told him that the times when plants grow the most are not necessarily during the warm, gentle rains or beautiful summer days. In fact, when the fierce winds blow and the raging storms come is the time of most growth. Botanists tell us that if you were to take a cross section of the earth during a vicious storm, you could literally observe the roots reaching further down into the soil.” He goes on to say, “The German poet Goethe said, ‘Talent is formed in solitude, but character in the storms of life: (pps 60-61). And I believe that if you take a cross-section of people in our churches, we can literally observe the same thing.

January 9

This was the last day of chemo at Kaiser for this go-round. Today was a normal day of four hours of the stuff. I asked the nurse today what they do with all the tubes that flow from the bags into my arms that are thrown into a yellow bin. I asked her if they sterilize them and use them again. She said that they burn them. They are too toxic to be reused. And to think that that is what is going into me! And when I get to Stanford, they say that the chemotherapy treatment there is five to ten times worse!

In the next couple of weeks, I will be mainly taking some more tests such as a echocardiogram, pulmonary, PET and probably a few more. I may be making a trip to Stanford or two as well. Hopefully, I will be getting the schedule soon for the Stanford part of the program and when I do, I will post that.

January 7-8

We had two more days of chemo of four hours each. This wound up the second cycle of chemotherapy at Kaiser in Walnut Creek.

Back at it in January 2009

We had a reprieve from treatment for three weeks over the Christmas holidays. But on January 6, 2009 the second cycle of the ICE treatment began with a visit to the oncologist at Kaiser and then twelve hours of chemo beginning Tuesday and going through Thursday. The first cycle went nicely and about ten days later, I started losing my hair. In Church on January 4, it was quite noticeable to our people . One of our friends wrote to us the next morning and asked if I had preached. Koyce intercepted the message and said, “Mary this is Koyce. Yes he did preach today and it was a great message. There were several of us with tears in our eyes not because of it being bad but because it was so great and with so much power and feeling that the Lord was in it. God gave him great strength and power in each word that was spoken. The song that finished the service was also very powerful.”

Below is a picture of our grandsons, Adam and Randall who shaved their heads in 2005 to show their solidarity with their grandpa.

Going back to Tuesday, January 6, we had a visit with our oncologist and we started the second cycle with a five hour session. As before, I brought my DVD player and watched the movie, Amazing Grace. I took the pills that they gave me for nausea and remembered taking three pills in the first cycle of Decadron, which is a steroid that got me up at 3:00 AM and kept me up the rest of the morning. The day went smoothly and on the way home we stopped to get some Protein Powder that I put in my chocolate milkshake later that evening.

Our Trip to Israel

We hosted a trip to Israel in June of 2008 and had a wonderful experience for Israel’s sixtieth anniversary. One of the special events of this trip was to be able to see for the first time the original copy of Isaiah that was discovered in the caves of Qumran. It was also our first time to go through Hezekiah’s tunnel as we usually went earlier in the year and the water was so cold or the tunnel wasn’t open yet for tourists.

We scheduled another trip to Israel in June of 2009 but after we were told by the people at The Stanford Medical Center that David would be in a state of recovery for six months, we decided to see if those people who wanted to go this year would be open to postponing the trip to 2010. It was unanimous so we decided that the plan would be for June of this year.

If you would like our basic itinerary and have interest in this trip, drop us an note and we will email you the program we had for our 09 trip that we will undoubtedly do in 2010. It should be a great time again and all of us who were planning on going are excited about the following year. In addition, we are thinking about an add on, maybe a trip to Greece and over to Ephesus or up to Germany to take in Oberammergau in Bavaria and then a little of Austria and Switzerland. So, start saving up your money!

How it Began in the Fall of 2008

In our journey through life, we came upon another major curve this past fall. After a routine physical, it was noticed that a number of my blood numbers were high. The test was redone a month later and the numbers were even higher. My physician notified my oncologist since I was treated for Hodgkins’ Lymphoma in 2005. They suspected that the Lymphoma had reoccurred. After two biopsies, their diagnosis was confirmed.

The plan was to take a number of tests, then two cycles of chemotherapy and get ready for a Stem Cell Transplant at The Stanford Medical Center that is nearby.